Is It Really Healing… Or Only Validation?

In today’s world, we’re invited daily, hourly even, to share. To post. To perform.

And sometimes, to process publicly.

We’re met with likes, shares, fire emojis, heartfelt comments.

We’re told: “You’re so strong.” “You’re healing.” “You’ve come so far.”

And while there’s something incredibly affirming about being seen and acknowledged, it’s worth pausing to ask: Is this really healing… or only validation?

Because validation and healing are not the same.

Validation stops at  “I see you.”

Healing goes on to say, “Let’s work through this.”

Validation can come from outside; an audience, a friend group, an algorithm.

Healing comes from within, often through introspection, discomfort, honesty, and courage.

Validation is not the villain.

Let me be clear; validation is important. Especially for those who have silently carried pain for so long.

To be affirmed is a balm. To feel safe enough to say, “This is my story,” and be met with warmth instead of shame, that matters deeply.

But validation can’t be the destination on your healing journey.

Because healing asks more of us.

Healing doesn’t always look beautiful or caption-worthy.

It's slower. It’s quieter.

It doesn’t typically announce itself with a trending sound or an aesthetic video.

Sometimes, healing looks like logging off.

Like unfollowing the voices that distract you.

Like having hard conversations or spending hours in therapy or prayer or solitude.

Sometimes healing looks like not posting anything at all.

The truth is: some of the deepest healing you’ll ever do won’t get any applause.

There won’t be a comment section for that chapter of your growth.

There won’t be a reel of transformation, just the deep, sacred work that only you and God will ever truly know.

Don’t confuse applause for progress.

We live in a time where it’s easy to curate the illusion of healing.

We’ve learned to perform resilience.

To turn our pain into content.

To post before we’ve processed.

But there’s a danger in that.

Not because you shouldn’t share, but because sometimes, in chasing likes, we lose touch with the deeper work.

Healing is not an aesthetic. It is a journey.

One that deserves your full presence, even when no one else is watching.

So what’s the invitation?

To be gentle with yourself.

To be honest about what you really need.

To recognize when you’re chasing visibility instead of doing the vulnerable work of becoming whole.

Dearest gentle reader,

it is my sincerest hope that you’ll choose true healing today.